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Lois Jean Arnold-McCory was my grandmother. I’m sad to say that in the last few adult years of my life I haven’t been as close to her as I previously was. She was still my Grandmother and I still loved her very much; but I didn’t get to see her as often as I would have liked what with her living in Florida for some of those years and me being away at college. Despite those years and that distance she still managed to keep our relationship fresh in our minds by remembering a birthday or some other special holiday and sending a card or present. She always made family her top priority.

I consider myself to be a big family guy. That was something that really hit home to me while I was away at college. Many of the friends I had made had families that they didn’t enjoy spending time with. I would hear them complain about having to go home for holidays or for summer break and they would wish that they could stay on campus away from their siblings or aunts and uncles or whomever. I was different. I couldn’t wait to get home for holiday breaks to spend time with my family.

Now older, and I like to think wiser, and beginning to start a family of my own, I’ve come to reflect on that scenario on more than one occasion. Our family, being rather small, has always been very close. For quite a while I really only had one cousin, Leah, and she and I were like brother and sister. My parents, brother, and I have vacationed each summer for many years with my cousin Leah, two Uncle Jeffs, and my aunts Peggy and Linda. We all enjoy spending time together. The more I think on this idea the more I’m convinced I know exactly where it comes from: my Grandma A.

She always made family a top priority whether it was by remembering a birthday and sending a card or making sure everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving or Christmas when we held them at her house. She was an excellent cook and one of the ways she liked to spoil us, her family, was by preparing succulent dinners which her beloved family would crowd around her and Grandpa’s great big dinning room table to consume. In fact, she made Christmas so special for our family that we all would typically spend the night at her house and wake up together on Christmas morning to celebrate – invariably, there would be some sort of excellent breakfast being prepared. In fact, I have a special story about one such Christmas.

I don’t remember the year, but it was quite a while ago. Even Leah was still a little girl and that made me even littler. As I mentioned above, the tradition was to go to Grandma and Grandpa’s house each Christmas Eve’s day to spend the evening with them and celebrate Christmas the next day. Well this particular Christmas there was an abnormal amount of snow on the ground – and it was still coming down. My mom, dad, and I were at my Uncle Jeff and Aunt Linda’s house on Christmas Eve’s day. The adults were in one room discussing our plans. It didn’t look hopeful for making the trek to Crystal Lake to my grand parents house for Christmas. As mom, dad, Uncle Jeff, and Aunt Linda were discussing the possibility of not going, they heard something. From the other room came the sobs of two small children – it was Leah and I. We were sobbing because they weren’t going to take us to Grandma and Grandpa’s for Christmas this year. The adults took one glance at the looks of utter despair on my and Leah’s faces and the debate about going or staying ended: we would go – no matter the weather! We did end up making it there and having a wonderful Christmas.

This memory and a great many others of get-togethers, camping trips, and big meals around her big dining room table are cemented in my mind as sterling examples of how I know my Grandma loved her family dearly. She was always a lady, but never above being in the center of a good old fashion bean fight. I am thankful for all the great memories that I and my family have as I’m sure memories are what can help us stop grieving and start celebrating the life that Grandma A lived.

But even more than the memories, I’m thankful for the distinct impression that she has left on my family. We will always be close and enjoy each others’ company because of the wonderful values she has instilled in us – right on through the generations. These values are especially important to me in a time where Kirsten and I will someday soon look to begin our own family. And as we are doing that I’m glad that we have had such a great example as my Grandma A to learn from. With the values she has instilled in all of us, I know our family will grow and stay just as close as we always have.

Thank you Grandma A, for always caring and for always loving. We will most certainly miss you, but I hope that we can take some small comfort from the knowledge that a little part of her will live on in the wonderful memories we have of her and the values that she has instilled in our family which will help to guide us in the future.

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